Today’s success tip comes from Michelle Duval.

Michelle became a pioneer by founding Equilibrio, one of the very first coaching firms in Australia. Since then she has also co-developed the international Meta-Coach Training SystemÆ, training professional coaches in 35 countries.

Once awareness of issues is identified, how can people facilitate their own change?

Step One: Develop self-sustaining motivation for the change - identify specifically what you are moving away from and what it is that you no longer want. List what it is costing you emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually and so on. Identify all of the discomfort and painful feelings it currently gives you, or could if you do not do something about it.

Simultaneously identify what you are moving toward - what it is that you want and desire. List all the benefits of what you really want and why you want it. Identify all of the positive feelings associated with such benefits, recognising what the change will lead to and open up in your life. Once you can feel this in your body, as pushing and pulling energy, you are ready for Step Two.

Step Two: Make a definitive decision - identify what you need or want to change. Is it an internal change to a belief, an aspect of your identity or behaviour? Is it an external change to a relationship, your environment or so forth? Weigh the pros and cons of what specifically you need or want to change.

Is the timing right in your life for this level of change and are you prepared to do what it will take to make the change at this time? When you feel the energy of having decided, and feel an impatience to do it, you are ready for Step Three. Do not try any level of change without personal motivation and making a decision.

Step Three: Create an inner game plan for the change - internally develop the identity, beliefs, values, and mind-set that are aligned with the new behaviours and actions you want to create. Without a fully formed and solidified inner game, the habits and behaviours you want to develop will be ill formed and unsustainable.

Step Four: Birth the outer game - begin to express the first incremental developments of the new behaviours or actions in your life. Take baby steps and build upon the strength of those small steps until you have developed momentum and strength. Create a list of tasks and actions that you can use to hold yourself accountable for step-by-step development of your new abilities.

Step Five: Solidify and reinforce the change in yourself and your life - begin by counting and recognising the smallest baby steps or expression of the new ability and behaviour. Avoid testing or critiquing the new skills until they are fully formed. During the first phase of developing the skill or initially expressing it, you must only look for the closest expression of it and validate it - just as you would a child learning to walk or talk.

Only then can you begin to test and critique where the skill may need further refinement and improvement. If you initially test and critique the first expression of change or skill development, the new abilities and behaviours will not mature and you will abort the change process. You will end up looping round and round without making progress. Count the smallest improvement and you will exponentially accelerate growth and solidify change in your life.

I hope you’ve learned a lot from this week’s Success Tip, check back again next time for more great advice from the experts.

Until then,

Allan Poole